What It's Like....

Most of you probably know that my mother passed away around six months ago. As time has passed and because my mom was young, I've had several friends ask what it's like to lose your mother.

In a phrase: It's odd.

You think that you can still call her and tell her a story. When something happens, you think to yourself, "I can't wait to tell Mom that...she'll think that's hysterical." More often than not, these things are about your children. No one besides your mom is more excited to hear stories or tidbits about the weirdo or amazing things your kids have done. I think that that has been the hardest part about losing Mom...even though she'd gone through everything with her own five kids and with her first five grandkids, whenever Colby would do something new, Mom would act like she was the first child ever to walk, sit up, eat cereal, etc. And I never realized that until after she was gone. All of us a sudden, a cheering section I previously hadn't acknowledged existed was gone.


The other thing is that the oddest, weirdest situations, comments, or items can bring a tear to your eye. I had two of them this week.


First, my friend Sara posted this post on her blog. I laughed hysterically. In Mom's bedroom at the farmhouse she had this old chest of drawers that had sheet sets still in the packages that were at least 20 years old. She was saving them for 'good'. I used to tease her and ask when the Queen of England was coming for a visit. One of the pillowsheet sets had fancy eyelet stuff sewed on the the edges...I wanted to use those pillowcases SO bad, and she wouldn't let me. She was saving them for 'good'. When I went to college and had to buy sheets for my bed, I bought the white pillowcases with the eyelet decorations at the end. :)


Second, I canned tomato juice this week. Mom used to do that when we were growing up and she used this "Squeeze-It" thing that attaches to your countertop to make juicing the tomatoes faster. I bought one off of e-bay a few years back, but it didn't have the wood plunger with it. So, a couple of Christmases ago, Mom found and bought me the wood plunger as a gift. I hadn't used it yet until I got into my box of canning supplies this week. It made me smile.



I keep an 11x14 of this picture in our living room...mom and us girls at my cousin's wedding last year. And, while I do love to sit in my chair and glance over at it on occasion....


....I find it's weird things like wood plungers for juicing tomatoes that really tug at my heart strings and make me miss Mom.